little minds

You know the verse about train up a child in the way they should go - according to their bent!

Well even though my parents went to church I don't think they knew this verse or spent much time on the according to their bent part. Not in a bad way - I just think their generation of parents functioned by spending quality time with their kids - not trying to figure them out!

Why all this you say? Well I happen to have a very interesting young boy whose bent is different than anyone in the family - he is, I believe asbstract sequential. This means he is very creative - capable of inventing amazing things with recycled goods, always has a project going in his head and would like to always have one going in the house, he designs things, his brain is always going, how does that work?, why?, I think.....

However, he also thrives on structure - doing things in a natural order and always doing it that way - this is tough for me in someways - I am structured too but not to the extent he is - if we are inconsistent he picks up on it right away - it is hard for him.

He is at his best when:

• there is freedom in the house for him to follow through with the latest idea for the project in his head - this may mean the machine he invented at a camp this summer, a the parachute he made for himself, or a recycled 3 foot snow globe in the kitchen powered by a small fan - yes, really, look at the pictures

• there is still a common structure in the home - breakfast at 7 lunch at 1130 dad home by 330 dinner around 530 and in bed by 8 at the latest



• you are available to help him at any moment with his idea - they are so big in his head yet he is not yet capable of carrying them out alone - grandma is great at this!



• the input going in his head causes him to grow - enjoys watching the news, having me read the newspaper, watching old NASA dvds, etc.



• no one - especially his sister - bothers him



• there is an organized (by his standards) mess in his room - not chaos though



• he is allowed to keep EVERYTING - every scrap of paper, miscellaneous screw, wood, egg carton, etc. they all have a project waiting

You might be thinking hmmmm or wow or even Oh my goodness!

His "bent" is so complicated I have trouble parenting it successfully. I am caught in a battle between who he is and what he "needs" to be according to the world, his school and our family.

I honestly have come to the point that most, if not all, of our struggles with him have to do with not understanding his bent. The quickest label would be strong willed - but that would not do him justice - it has something to do with his way of thinking and he does not understand at 7 1/2 that we all don't think that way - how come we don't get it - what's so tough about it.

I believe there are great things in his future - I believe God has a plan for him - I also believe I can sidetrack that plan by squelching his continued processing and designing because it does not "fit" or looks out of place in this "world"

He is very fragile emotionally - he is 7 - but his vocabulary is crazy - so he makes you think he has it all together with his words - but on the inside he is melting down. My husband has been slowly discovering the inner workings of Noah's emotions after many difficult melt downs. He is awesome at "debreifing" and getting to the root.

All this is to say that "little minds" are way more complicated than we think and what we see and hear are not always a fair way to judge who they are - no matter how they think they still are only as old as they are - in this case 7!!

Lord please help do what you want me to do - help me rely on you and your wisdom about the little boy you designed to be Noah, help me to follow whatever you lay on my heart and not dismiss it because it doesn't line up with other parents or society - continue to give me insight into his bent so I can parent him in your way! In Jesus Name AMEN!!!