Tuesday, September 30, 2008

surrender

So the other day at church Dr. Bob was speaking on the bitterness that develops from past hurts that aren't forgiven -- ok that's my take on it :) I sat there thinking "thank you Jesus" for helping me get through that major thing back before Don and I were married. I also thought "wow" I am so glad that you brought me to the point of forgiveness and I know how freeing it is. I was in complete agreement with Dr. Bob - I had been where he was talking about and with God I had taken the steps necessary to get to the other side. It felt affirming and reassuring to know that I am not carrying that burden!

Then came worship :( out of my mouth came "I surrender all" and I had to choke back the tears - God got right in the middle of me - with this: you made it through the big thing but what about the small stuff - the daily stuff - do you surrender that?? I had no perfect answer for Him.

Not a service has gone by in the past 18 months that something does not hit me - a lesson to learn or a moment of gratitude - I am amazed at how present God is at GCC and I am thankful that I am able to fully engage when I am there. I am not who I was 18 months ago - and I am not who I will be 18 months from now.

So what now.... I need to bring my little stuff to Him and let it go!!

2 comments:

Kristin Baker said...

Great reminder, Caryn! Mind if I share this with our worship leaders? Sometimes they work so hard but get the feel that worship can become the filler for getting the late people in their seats or getting the offering plates passed. I think it would encourage them to know how worship affected you personally. Let me know. Thanks!

heather said...

i tracked you down... great meeting you sunday! i enjoyed this post!