Sunday, January 20, 2008
life goes on part 2
Is anybody else treading water? I feel as though I am doing one of those lifeguard tests - you know the one where they ask you to have on all your clothes then you get in the water tread water for what seems like days and have to remove your clothes too? Does that sound like an impossible task? It does to me - however right now I feel like I being very unsuccessful at treading water and that several times a day I am gulping down yucky dirty water, spitting it out and trying to tread again with tired sore worn out muscles. Can I get my feet on solid ground? Why does everything seem to go way out of balance dependent upon my son's behavior? I am not talking about typical 7 1/2 year old boy stuff - I am talking about anger! anger towards me and my husband -- anger with his mouth and his arms and legs - it is crazy so crazy - and we have found nothing that works -- we have tried a lot and still feel as though we are failing -- it seems as though every other day I feel as though he is sabotaging our family! I know this is just a feeling! I know God is in control! I know this too shall pass! I also know it stinks too!
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3 comments:
Caryn,
I know you are going through a hard time with your son. I will continue to pray for God to give you the wisdom and patience to deal...
Christine
P.S. Although I've been so bad at commenting/contributing to your blog, I've appreciated your openness and authenticity! Thanks.
I know what you mean about just treading water. For us, it's financial. It's always been financial. We can't get ahead, we can barely keep up and credit cards get overloaded and house taxes are outrageous and now, Derick's work is going down to 3 days and a week off. What?! A week with no work and we haven't even caught up from Christmas break yet!
I feel like I'm sinking into debt more and more and nothing I'm doing is helping at all. We just get more bills and less work.
I know God is in this somewhere, somehow, but right now, in the thick of it, I don't know where He's pointing us.
Is it time to move on and find another job for Derick? Is it time to take the girls to day care (although I hate the thought) and get a real job? Where is He pointing us? Where does He want us?
Yeah, I kind of fell like I'm drowning today. But I'm trying my best to trust.
Kim
Kim - I am so thankful you are my neighbor - times like this are tough and I am sorry that it is where you are at right now. We love and care for you and your family and pray that God would give you direction in this messy place!
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